Friday, March 30, 2012

TTFN: This is not a Listicle

Oh yes, I'm back, and the Top Ten Friday Night is back, let's have some fun.  Let me say briefly that I always learn something from doing these. Always.

100.  10 Things you probably did not know about Sloths.

3. All sloths have three-toes, even the “two-toed” ones

 The name might sound like a simple way to describe this gentle creature, but even names in nature can be misleading. It’s true that two-toed sloths only have two claws on their forelimbs, but both the two-toed and three-toed sloth have three claws on their hind-limbs. That means two-toed sloths have “two fingers,” not “two toes”. The discrepancy derives from the names in the Spanish translation for the two-toed sloth, “Perezoso de Dos Dedos.” “Dedos” means fingers, which caused some confusion for the English translation.
Sloths: misnomer, translation error, or nit picking petty idiocy?

99. 17 Movies worth Geeking out to in 2012.

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance
I never get tired of listening to Nick Cage’s “I am talking through my nose” voice. Never! I didn’t enjoy the first Ghost Rider but for some reason I have the urge to see this one. Johnny Blaze (love the cheese), is still battling with the curse of being the Ghost Rider, so he decides the best thing to do is hide out in a remote part of Eastern Europe. Poor Johnny, don’t you know you can’t really hide from evil? It always finds you. In this case, it comes knocking when a secret sect of the Catholic Church asks him to save a boy from becoming possessed by Roarke, The Devil himself, who put the curse on Johnny. What will Johnny do? I don’t know but I hope he sets things on fire! The guy has a flaming motorcycle! I have no idea why I am not into this more.

Really? Ghost Rider? Nicholas Cage? Worth geeking out to? Ladies and Gentleman, we found the reason why Michael Bay gets to keep making shitty movies.

91. A collection of 37 Kisses:

A tourist poses for a picture with the Sphinx at the Pyramids of Giza in Cairo, Egypt, on October 19, 2011. (Reuters/Jamal Saidi) 

Yeah, I'm sentimental. There's something here for everyone. Especially animal lovers.

87. 9 of the Best (Worst) Fictional Games in Movies.

2) Military Simulators in Lawnmower Man

Okay, so this isn't really a game, it's a military simulator created for chimps who use "infrared battle helmets" to train for combat, but it a) looks a lot like a game and b) was turned into an atrocious SNES and computer game, so it counts. The "game" itself looks eerily like those trippy, computer-generated Mind's Eye VHSes peddled in the early '90s, only with a gun onscreen as the player careens around hugely digitized - but still mind-blowing, for its time - vistas. Hey, if it's good enough for chimps to play, why can't a human? Oh, right, because it makes people who play it go insane. 
Lawnmower man is such a guilty pleasure movie. It's terrible, but in the right way,

75. 21 Reasons you should be following the NBA's weirdest player on Twitter.

13. He Feels Betrayed By The Flawed Logic Of Cartoons

He Feels Betrayed By The Flawed Logic Of Cartoons
Source: @JaValeMcGee34
Source: @JaValeMcGee34

Go read #16 on that list. If you laughed you'll be joining me in hell.

63. John Carter and 15 of the Biggest Movie Flops of All time.

‘Battlefield Earth’

One of the most reviled films of all time, ‘Battlefield Earth’ lost $73 million and almost killed John Travolta’s career for a second time following his ‘Pulp Fiction’ comeback. So what went wrong? Pretty much everything. A pet project of vocal Scientologist Travolta, this adaptation of the sci-fi novel by the religion’s controversial founder L. Ron Hubbard wanted to be the next ‘Star Wars.’ Instead, it was lambasted for its hokey dialogue, hammy acting, terrible special effects and copious dreadlocked characters. Oh, and Travolta’s creepy lizard tongue. There are some things you can’t un-see.
First, John Carter is not a flop. It's made a profit. A movie that turns a profit is not a flop. A miss? Sure. A "Meh". Yeah we can go with that, but it is not a flop. Secondly, I saw Battlefield Earth in the theater. Yes, I knew what a was doing at the time, and wanted to be able to say I saw the worst movie ever in the theater.

51.  99 of the Hottest Fictional Women of 2012.

Moira O'Hara
Credit: FX

Moira O'Hara

Never before had we even considered banging a ghost, but then the buxom Moira O'Hara fromAmerican Horror Story came along and we were shook to our sexual cores. FX's smash hit series introduced us to the fiery redheaded housekeeper, but there was something a little oddabout her. To women, she appears as an old woman, but to dudes she's the hot piece of service we know and love. She was one of the few helpful ghosts in the Harmon house, and at the end of the season worked to prevent any others from falling victim to its spell.
I have not watched an episode of this show yet, but did see a couple animated gifs of her, and I will check this show out. Smoking.

48.  10 Coolest Sidekicks in Science Fiction and Fantasy.

3) Samwise
The most steadfast of Frodo's companions, and basically the true hero of the saga — Samwise is the one who gets the freaking job done. Like a lot of the other sidekicks on this list, he's pretty much the main reason the good guys win. Samwise seems like a simple gardener, but he has more heart and spirit — and more ingenuity — than most other Hobbits put together.

The gardener turns out to be a total bad-ass, that's pretty cool.

36. TV's Top 9 Warrior Women.
9. Danaerys Targaryen:Game of Thrones is filled with powerful, deadly women, but none match the determination and will of Danaerys. Transformed from a powerless pawn in her brother’s power play to a bold Dothraki Khaleesi (Queen), she embraces the customs of her adopted people and rebuilds herself over and over again, becoming stronger each time. She does little fighting herself (keep an eye out for Brienne of Tarth in season two for a more traditional warrior), but when she enters the fray, her foes rarely live to regret it.
Preferred weapon: Dragons
I really dislike Buffy at #7, but Danaerys is awesome because she starts out so meak and scared. She grows into being a fierce Goddess-Queen.  Character development kids, it is important. And of course #1 is #1, no question.

33. 10 of the best Cyborgs, Androids, and Robots in TV

7 Tweede

While Buck Rogers is not quite a popular as the show once was, it is still an iconic example of early SciFi fantasy going all the way back to the original novel Armageddon 2419 AD and the even earlier movie serials in the 1930's. The 1980's TV show is how most people of my generation best know Buck and we were introduced to his robot sidekick Tweede who wears the brilliant computer brain Dr. Theopolois around his neck. This comic duo all-in-one package idea has seldom been copied in other stories and is quite humorous and effective on the show. "Tweedtweedeee What's up Buck?"

I loved this little guy as a kid. He was two robots in one! If anything needs a reboot, it's Buck Rodgers.

24. 12 Colleges Bringing Comic Books into the Classroom.
  1. Teachers College, Columbia University
    Since 2001, The Comic Book Project at Columbia University has brought comic book writing to K-12 schools. Originally started at just one elementary school in Queens, 11 years later there are now more than 850 schools across the country benefiting from the project that brings a love of literature and support for learning through the creation of comic books. The Comic Book Project offers workshops for teaching students how to write and create their very own comic book from start to finish, providing an outlet for creativity and a place to explore issues in their own lives. Organizers have found that pairing visual and written plotlines in this way has been especially helpful for struggling readers who may have trouble bringing it all together. Students who complete comic books with the program also benefit from being able to share their book online through the project’s website.
Let's see, Ivy League, teacher's college, this one will have a positive impact on the next generation of kids. Way to go every school on this list.

12.  115 Reasons we Love Buffy.

5. Who Love Buffy
Buffy's Body .jpg
This list has too things I love, triple digits and Buffy. My love for Buffy is both pure and impure.  Joss Whedon is a Genius.  Check out the list, it's fodder for die-hard Buffy fans.

1. 24 Parodies of the "The Treachery of Images":

Picture via Perpetually Passé
This is one of my favorite pieces of art, and parodies of it work on more levels than the amazing original.

Thanks for reading,
Your favorite returning blogger,

PS- As per the rule, this list contains no slideshows! A few are broken in parts, but nothing ridiculous.  Please feel free to pass on lists for future posts.
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