Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Werner Herzog reads Twas the Night Before Christmas

Some of you will remember when he read Where's Waldo, and now the mad German is back, with his bleak esoteric view of this Xmas classic.

Oh wow, that twisted a childhood classic into a messed up pretzel.  Wonderful.  I know these videos are not really him, but that does not matter.  Whoever writes them, whoever reads them, whoever thought of this, all them deserve praise.  These videos never stop making me smile.

And if I could make a request, Dr. Seuss, and not just the Dr, but You Don't Know How Lucky You Are.  My favorite of the good Dr's books.  And one that would perfectly fit this style of double parody.


Thanks for reading,
Your favorite has no idea what New German Cinema is blogger,

Monday, December 20, 2010

Sarah Silverman's Xmas Song

This song is clearly not safe for wimps.  Because Sarah herself is not safe for wimps.

Play and enjoy at your risk.  And if you need a further guideline: If the Cthulhu songs offended you then don't hit play, there is no hope for you.

I heard an edited version of this song on the radio the other day.  It was great, and very surprising.  Because the words being censored are not the offensive parts of the song.

Give the Jew Girl Toys

Thanks for reading,
Your most favoritist borderline offensive blogger,

PS- Remember kids, Don't be a douche, what would Jesus do?

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Christmas in the Stars

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present for your pleasure, the greatest Christmas Song ever recorded.

What do you get a wookie for christmas ( When he already owns a comb)

When I worked at KBToys, this song was on our xmas soundtrack every year.  You learn to love a song like this when it is forced upon you in such a manner.  I believe it is related to Stockholm Syndrome.  Also, this song was on an album.  Christmas in the Stars  I will not bombard you with the entire album, as only this song has any appeal to me.  But it's all out there if you enjoy torturing yourself.

thanks for reading,

Monday, December 6, 2010

A Very Cthulhu Christmas Part 1

Did you know that there are not one but TWO Cthulhu / Lovecraftian X-mas albums out!  And guess who spent way too much time on youtube listening to these songs?   And guess who's going to share them with you?

A Very Scary Solstice and An Even Scarier Solstice were recorded by the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society

Below are about 15 songs from the two albums.  I'll gather up the rest for later this week.  These are all well produced tracks posted because they are funny.

I Saw Mommy Kissing Yog-Sothoth

Freddy the Red Brained Mi-Go

The Cultist Song

It's The Most Horrible Time Of The Year

I'm Dreaming Of a Dead City

The Shoggoth Song

Have yourselves a scary little Solstice

Silent Night, Blasphemous Night

Death To The World (with lyrics)

carol of the old ones

Awake Ye Scary Great Old Ones

All I Want For Solstice Is My Sanity

Harley Got Devoured by the Undead

It's beginning to look a lot like fish-men

The Great Old Ones Are Coming To Town

Thanks for sharing my blasphemy,

Friday, December 3, 2010

OBI (Other's Bad Ideas)

Watch my buddy Rich crowd surfing in a Pink Bunny Suit.

Wait about 20 seconds for the Pink Bunny.

If the suit looks familiar, that's because it is.  I MADE IT INFAMOUS.  The same exact suit went to Pittsburgh with me for a Halloween party in '03.

Somehow when he and I worked together we got things done.  I do not know how.

Thanks for Reading,
"You'll shoot your eye out!"

Inappropriate Xmas Song (you've been warned)

I don't think you'll find a more inappropriate Christmas song.  One that is also an amazingly strong Song to get Stuck in your Co-Workers' Heads.

It's too wrong for me to post, but too right to not share.  So basically what I'm saying is....

Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas

Monday, I'll be back with Music Monday, and the rest of the month's Music Mondaysv shall be composed of horrible Xmas Music posted to ensure my arrival in hell upon my death. And yes, I can top this song.

Thanks for reading,
Your favorite Holiday blogger,

Friday, November 19, 2010


Warning, this post is full of random animated .gif's.  They are more likely to offend than to cause seizures.  But they will annoy, guaranteed.

There is this nasty rumor going around that Blogger and Animated .gif's don't play well together, and in fact there is evidence to support this rumor.

I inserted these two different ways, and *fingers crossed* they appear to be working.  I know I've posted animated .gif's before, won't link back because that post is so littered with broken hotlinks.  I repent my sins.

So the debate will rage, and hopefully Blogger's masters at Goggle will figure it out.  Because it sure the hell does not make any sense to me.

Thanks for dealing with slice of random,

PS - Credit to the guy that made these.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Brand New Key

This week's song to get stuck in your Co-Woker's / Classmates heads is a song from the worst musical decade in the history of mankind, the 70's.

Melanie's - Brand New Key

You've heard it before, and admit it, you like it.  You'll sing it, without any ability to stop.  You'll see someone roller skating and you're doomed.  I probably should have used it this summer, but it's in that ad, and this gag's sole purpose is to get these songs OUT of my own head.

Once again, I thank you for your masochism,
it warms my soul.
Your Ol' Pal,

PS - Good things are on the way, stay tuned.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Year Round Fresh Apple Cider

I am fortunate enough to live in an area where fresh (and not pasteurized) apple cider is readily available for a good quarter of the year.  When my wife was living in Maui while we were dating, I found out something awesome about fresh apple cider.  I was talking about my long-distance girlfriend's love of apple cider with someone at my local orchard, Honey Pot Hill, and they shared an amazing piece of information with me.  It can be frozen for up to a year and still be good.  I already had a trip to Maui planned for February, so I bought 2 Half Gallon Bottles and froze them.  I put them in my checked bag when I flew out, thinking that they would be fully defrosted by the time I landed.  I did not factor in the unpressurized luggage compartment on the plane, so the cider did not defrost at all.  This included not just the 12 hours flying but the extra 4 hours I got stuck in LA as well.  It did not matter, the look on my woman's face was worth it.  She was not aware cider could be frozen, and was extremely happy to be having real cider.

So to freeze apple cider the most important to remember is to use the old school half gallon container, as seen below.

The Gallon ones do not have the seam strength to handle the expansion of the cider.  Also place it vertically while freezing to keep the lid from popping off.

After a quick Google some people repackage the cider before freezing, but I am far too lazy for that.   And for those who are not aware there is a huge difference between fresh cider and pasteurized cider.  Pasteurizing cider is a crime.

So if you do not live in apple country, and know someone who does, have them do this for you.  It will be a life changing experience.

and you are welcome,
Your ever cider-loving blue-eyed blogger,

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A Game of Thrones

Most of you know by now, that I am developing a severe dislike of movies.  It is such a played out and horribly done medium of entertainment that I am nearly done with it.  It does not help that Americans are programmed to be obsessed with movies, when 99% of them suck, and suck horribly.  There is no originality left in Hollywood.  I do understand that there is nothing new under the sun, but come on at least try to be a little creative.  When there is more creativity being put into Doritos flavors than into movies, we have a serious problem as a society.

The thing that has really killed it for me, are the horrible Novel and Comic Book adaptations.  I'm looking at you Harry Potter.  Weasly is our King.  'Nuff said.  Movies are a very compact medium.  They are short stories, they are knock knock jokes, they are midgets, 30 second commercials.  That is what they are.  But people, fans and movie makers themselves, seem to forget this.  So everyone reaches for the grand epic tale.  Grand Epic tales do not fit into a 2-3hr time frame.  It is just physically impossible.  This is why time and again the best movies come from short stories.

However, I too like visuals, and do want to see printed words translated into something more tangible.  And there is a way to do this: The TV Mini-series.  Roots.  N'uff Said.  And someone at HBO, the people that seemingly can do nothing wrong, and who have already saved the Mini-Series, Band of Brothers, have realized that they can do more than just save it.  They can bring it back to a place of prominence.  And I bring to to you the trailer for A Game of Thrones:

I am so thankful for this, and I have never read one of these books.  But this is how most Novels and Comic Books should be done.  And hopefully HBO will set the world straight and the broadcast networks will copy this.


Thanks for Reading,
your fellow geek,

PS - Death to Movies!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Kay Bee Tuesday: Christmas Bunnies

During one Easter season we got tons of large stuffed animals of the springtime/easter variety: Bunnies, Ducks, etc.  KB tried every easter to turn Easter into a mini christmas, and it nearly always failed.  This year fell right into that pattern.  We got stuck with a ton of these stuffed animals.  We loaded them into clear 100 gallon trash bags and shoved them in the empty space above our office.  (I will explain the crazy ways the backrooms were set-up in a future post.)

Christmas rolled around and it was a good one.  We were halfway through December and running out of everything.  It was then that these Large Stuffed Bunnies were visable again above the office.  We decided what the hell, let's put them on the floor and see!  They flew.  We could not believe how fast they sold.  5 of these 100 gallon trash bags full of them and we could not keep them on the sales floor.

The moral of the story: People are bat-shit crazy and will buy ANYTHING during the holiday season.

Thanks for reading,
Your favorite former retail manager,

PS - If KB were still open and I were still working there I would probably be stuffing the hell out of my overstock shelves with board games right now.

PPS- This is one of my favorite xmas stories from KB, and one of the few my wife is not sick of hearing.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Dr Martens's Free Downloads

Since I am rocking the hell out of Music Monday, here's a link to Dr Marten's for 10 free downloads of some really good covers.

Oedipus is the man.  Glad he's still doing his thing in a new format.

Thanks again,
And hopefully next Monday will be as loaded,

15 albums meme Part 1

This meme was floating around facebook and I had to play along.  It was 15 in 15, so it was a timed list.  I made some incorrect choices.  And made other choices for incorrect reasons.  But things needed to be sorted out in a much longer time independent format.

Warning many of these videos are in the newer HTML5 format.  If they don't play go download a decent web browser.

1. Fugazi - 13 Songs

"What's Fugazi?  Is it Japanese for noise?" My sophmore homeroom teacher.  I was not cool enough to be into Fugazi then.  I had not even found good music at that point.

I should have picked Red Medicine.  I was going to and went back and forth several times.  I have already posted Waiting Room, easily the best song on the album.  And I am torn as to what to pick from this album to post here.  Red Medicine had more songs that stood out on their own, while 13 Songs was a better overall album.  I choose Suggestion, even though I am as guilty of the crimes in this song as any man.  

2. Dinosaur Jr - Bug

You know how I said that I made some choices for the wrong reasons?  This is that one.  I should have gone with the album that changed my life upon it's first listen, Green Mind.  But I choose the one I liked better, 15+ years later.  Mistake.  

But since I choose this album I feel a deep moral obligation to share with you one of the best band break-up  songs of all time, a song I have included on every Dinosaur Jr mixtape I have ever made.  Don't   Can you believe they got back together again after this song?!?!?!?!  This song is by no means indicative of the band.

3. Operation Ivy - Complete Discography

Words aren't needed here.  Either you get it or you don't. 

Here We Go again.

4. They Might Be Giants - Apollo 18

In the eternal debate over which album is better Apollo 18 or Flood, the correct answer is John Henry.  

If I wasn't Shy (live)

5. Juliana Hatfield - Bed

Picked wrong again.  But I love this woman so much I cannot go wrong.  This album is dirty and sexy, just not her best, but still damn good.  And I always spell her name wrong, like a jerk.  I actually loved her "Sellout" album.  Ms Hatfield, I liked that album. (That song is obviously not from that album, but from her kickass EP Do Not Disturb.)

Bad Day

I nearly spilled a beer on her at a show in Providence once.  The friend I was with yelled me for NOT spilling my beer on her so I would stop being a coward and talk to her because she was hanging in the crowd during the opening acts.  I should have listened to this friend.

6. Go-Kart vs The Corporate Giant (comp disc)

When deciding between Comp Discs, this was a no-brainer.  I could listen to this whole album over and over.

Weston - Retarded

"You are so retarded / I must be retarded too!"

I have to pick two off this one, I can't stand just picking one song!

The Meatmen - Morrisey must Die!

Offended by these two songs?  Then do not track down this CD.  Note: I do love the Smiths, but this song is still awesome.

7. This is Boston Not LA (comp disc)

Need to pick 3 from this disc, because the songs are so short.  And yes the names of the bands is half the reason I originally bought this disc. (With the Unsafe at Any Speed EP at the end!)  This CD is still the hardest, fastest, most intense piece of my music collection.

Jerry's Kids - Straight Jacket

That song has the most amazing bass line.  If I had to pick a bass line to be my heartbeat, that's it.

The Freeze - This is Boston Not LA

If you dance the same and dress the same
It won't be long 'til you are the same
You look the same
you act the same
There's nothing new when you're to blame.

(Discrimination summed in a song about the difference between LA and Boston punk in the early 80's.)

The Proletariat - Options

Again a song that rings true today nearly 30 years later.  Suck on that whiny hippie protest music.

8. The Mighty Mighty Bosstones - More Noise and Other Dissturbances

Bust out the air trombones, I nailed this one.

Where'd You Go?

9. Green Day - 1039 Smoothed Out Slappy Hours

When making a "Love" Mixtape for my wife while we were dating and she was living in Maui, I nearly made a disc consisting of half this disc and half of Bjork's Debut.  If you hate Blink 182-esque pop-punk, then give this album a listen and you'll hear what it could have sounded like, and it sounded good.  I used 2,000 light Years Away to play on the distance angle, but I have to go with At the Library, sorry Going to Pasalaqua!

I love this whole album.  Kerplunk was my first green day album, this was 2nd, and then 2 weeks after I got this I saw Longview on MTV and was very confused.  It seemed like it could be the same band.  Green Day has a permanent place in my heart for this album, and the fact that they still some of these songs live!

10. Rancid - Let's Go!


"When I got the Music, I got a place to go!"

11. Lunachicks - Pretty Ugly

I should have gone with Luxury Problem, but it's a tough call all around.  All the albums have songs will make people wonder about me, and all have their great songs and their weak ones.   This was as good a choice as any.  Although Jerk of All Trades is my favorite song of theirs.  They were such a great live band.


I need to share their cover of Heart of Glass.

12. The Pixies - Surfa Rosa

Gotta pick my favorite Pixies song, although this is my favorite album of theirs.


13. Pennywise - Unknown Road

This was thew album that got me into Pennywise.  Not their best, but damn fucking good.  This tape went with me everywhere.  So inspirational.  I always said if I ever get cancer, stack my Pennywise discs next to me, and all will be fine.


14. L7 - Bricks are Heavy

Another one where I went with the album that got me into the band.  I love L7 and this album.  Perfect roadtrip music.  I first heard Shitlist while watching Natural Born Killers, and once I saw it was one the same album as Pretend that You're Dead, I bought it and they won me over.  If you don't feel One More Thing, then you don't feel anything.

One More Thing

15. The Gits - Enter the Conquering Chicken

Viva Zapata

The song I want to use isn't anywhere for embedding, so I'm going to use the Evil Stig version and tell 2 tales.  I first heard this song from the Evil Stig version.  It wasn't until a few years later that I heard about The Gits from my good friend, Jess.  It was then that I realized who Evil Stig was and my mind was blown.  Evil Stig was the surviving members of The Gits, with Joan Jett doing Mia's vocals.   Wow.  Also, after hearing this song, I put Evil Stig on my Xmas list, and my mom, as always at the time, took my list of CD's and my Sister's to Newbury Comics, handed the list over to the first employee there she saw and said pick 3 from each list.  Newbury Comics, for those who do not know, is a legendary independent record store in New England, and at the location my mom went to, they had never heard of Evil Stig.

Bob (Cousin O.)

It hurts me to be angry / kills me to be kind

In Part 2 I'll go through albums I should have put on this list, is I wasn't going to stick with one album per band, the 15 album limit, and other sillyness.

Thanks for reading,

Universal Heartbeat

I am going to be nice this week and at the same time take a risk.  This week's song to get stuck in your coworker's / classmates' heads is a song you may not have heard before.  But it is one of my favorites, it's true as hell, and it will be stuck in my head as a result of this.

Juliana Hatfield - Universal Heartbeat

Juliana Hatfield - Universal Heartbeat
Uploaded by jesus_lizard. - See the latest featured music videos.

Sing it with me kids: "A heaaaaaart, a heart the hurts is a heaaaaaart, a heart that works."  And repeat.

Your favorite pushing his own musical tastes down your throat blogger,

PS- Butthead you are correct, she is hot.  I never knew you were part of the IBTC fanclub.  (I will not post it, you can find yourself.)

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Kay Bee Tuesday

We changed up responsibilities at work and I took over the deposit.  I am glad I did because in my previous professional life as a retail manager I was counting deposits on a near daily basis.  After a quick reminder that you actually have to count the money, I blew threw my task and was reminded of the story time segment I wanted to start here.

My last Green Friday that I worked at KB Toys, back in 2002, I counted the deposit.  We split it in two, but combined, all counted by me, totaled more than my year's salary at the time.  That was just the cash.    

Yes at KB the day after Thanksgiving was called Green Friday, a term I can't shake.  We'd do three weeks worth of sales on that day.  For us it was the Super Bowl.  Two months of prep, and the real beginning of sacrificing time with friends and family for a stupid job for a company that was horribly run.  Good times.

Next week I will tell you the tale of the Christmas Bunnies.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Safety Dance

Earlier this week, one of my favorite blogs, Universal Hub, threw this song into a post.  I thought he was going in a different direction but the joke worked and he inadvertently paid tribute to this very concept.  So he gets the kudos.

I am torn, this song is one I like, but in no way can I say I am playing nice this week.

Thanks for reading,
Yer Ol' Pal,

PS- Cause your friends don't dance, and if they don't dance, then they're no friends of mine!

PPS- I really thought he was going to choose this song, instead.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Imperial March

This week's song to get stuck in your co-workers' heads is the Imperial March from Star Wars, also sometimes mistakenly refereed to as Darth Vader's theme song.

Yes, this one is particularly mean.  It is easily hummed, allows you to mock your boss, and everyone is familiar with it.  If you require further brain lodging assistance, I offer you 17 amazingly geeky covers of the Imperial March, including the Steel Drums, 8-bit, and this girl (who is my new hero):

Go visit her YouTube page for more nasal awesomeness.  This girl blows....her nose.

Thanks for being my willing minion,

PS - coda for the covers

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Silly Game Saturday: HAWX 2 mini-game

This game passes the test, the boy could play it over and over until I had to make him stop.  And I knew exactly which plane he choose even though I wisely did not watch.    The game was just a fun little 8-bit throwback they used as a marketing gimmick.  This will be an effective marketing gimmick for almost any game until the Gen-X crowd starts getting to AARP.

The evening you lost to this game is not my fault,

Monday, September 27, 2010

Banana Splits

So it appears that I have not fully explained how this works.

This song is a song in which you play right now.  It gets stuck in your head.  You then take this song that is stuck in your head to school/work/wherever and you hum it, sing, mangle it, whatever, until you get it stuck in as many co-workers heads as possible.  This is the mental flu in sonic form.  Get yourself sick, make yourself suffer a little, and then make as many people around sick, or make them suffer as much as possible.  I do understand that doing this with a song you like is easier, doing it with a song you hate is far more effective.  Given the situation, we have to keep things in the former this week rather than the latter.

This song should be E - A - S -Y!

This song is of course the theme song to The Banana Splits TV Show.

Your suffering is my joy, spread them both.

Your favorite masochistic blogger,

PS- I could not skip The Dickies.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010


I have yet to install it properly, but I like it.  And for $5, I am greatly impressed.  I'll need to play and adjust and fix, but for now, it's slapped up and appropriate.

Horrible Logos

It only took like 3 days, and at five bucks a pop, this guy may actually be supporting himself on this.  Or getting Frat-boy drunk every single weekend.

I found the site from SuperPunch (you had a coinflip guess...) and it's the first money I've ever spent on this blog.   I am very happy because it's fitting and there are many ways to play with it.

Thanks for feeding my madness,
Yer Ol' Pal,

PS- Google, why do you insist on underlining my links?  I think it' reeks of 1999.

Monday, September 20, 2010

We Built This City

A throw back this week to the 80's for the song to get stuck in your co-workers' heads.  And if you are over 30 you will sing along without any desire to do so.

We Built This City - Starship

If there is a band that symbolizes the excess cheese of the 80's, this is it.  This band is also what happens when musicians who are drug users, stop using drugs.  You are better off dead than cleaning up.  Of course, not using drugs to be creative in the first place is the best path.  But if you gotta high to be a star, then you are better off dead.   I'm looking at you Mr. New American Idol Judge, Steve Tyler.  I am also thankful Kurt Cobain and Bradley Noel passed away.  Oh the crap both of them would be dealing out now would make you cry.

Thanks for torturing yourself and others,
Your favorite blogger,

PS- I just previewed this post to edit it and sincerely apologize for the screen cap YouTube choose for this video, it is quite frightening.  If you have kids I offer my deepest regrets.  No, I'm not switching to a different clip.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Reason I Should not be Allowed to Have Kids - #1,385,491

This video.  I will remember it, and if the opportunity arises, I shall recreate it.


Thanks for Reading,
Your ever-lovin' Blue Eyed Blogger,

Monday, July 19, 2010

Wedding Ring

Here is my wedding ring.

Not only do I love it, and my Wife loves it, but I get complimented on it at lest once a week.  The ring is made out of Tungsten Carbide, which gives it that dark chrome feel to it.  One of the things I like, is that when a customer at work comments on, they often know what it is made of.  I work for an industrial supply wholesaler, so my customers are typically the blue collar type.  That makes it better, because they aren't used to commenting upon jewelry, never mind another guy's jewelry. 

It is much heavier than a typical wedding band, and I like that.  It was also a last minute desperation driven purchase made on a limited budget.  This adds to the emotionl value for me because it feels nice ending up stuck with something that you really like.  Something you did not spend much money on, and something that gets noticed.

With the job I have, my ring gets dirty and banged around quite a bit, so the pragmatic value is also very high.

My wife has looked around for replacement rings made of Tungsten, but with the Irish Wedding Band engravings.  Our original plan was matching Irish Wedding bands in Platinum.    She's found some good candidates, more than we found in platinum!  But I am not sure if I want to replace my ring.  I love it and it has a great story to it.  But I am married so if she really wants it replaced she will win eventually.  It may just take a decade or two.

Thanks for reading,
Your Ol' Pal,

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Mahna Mahna

This week's song to get stuck in your co-worker's heads is a personal favorite, but I warn you, I am not being nice, at all.  In fact even Dick Chenney would clasify the use of this song while interrogating terrorists, as torture and a violation of the Geneva Convention.

Mahna Mahna:


Did you know this song has it's own Wikipedia page?  Really.  Apparently it's one of those nonsese wordless sung songs like the Russian Rickroll.

There is a story to this for me as well.  While working overnights during my first Christmas at KBToys back in '98, this song saved my life.  We were at the shift change.  Me and the the two guys I worked with were at work, but the clsoing crew had not finished yet so there were a good 10-12 people in the store working.  The manager was done coutning the money so I was free to go into the office to plug my CD player into the stores sound system so that we could play obnoxious music at loud volumes so the security guards at the other end of the mall knew we were there, and so the Mall Walkers would be too scared to show up before 6 am.  Someone came up with a great idea of locking me in the office by piling up full boxes of merch in front of the door.  This worked great because there was just enough room in the stockroom to open the office door.  The boxes were wedged from door to opposite wall with ease.  I was not getting out until I was let out.  I got bored and decided I wanted out.  So I pulled out my loudest most obnoxious cd, This Is Boston, Not LA! and turned the volume on my cd player and the store's sound system all the way up.  Three to four soungs in and I knew this wasn't working.  I changed tactics, drastically, and put in my Muppets cd.  I found the most annoying song on there, Manamana and I was freed 45 seconds into the song.  No one that christmas at that KB worked harder or faster at any task, than did the two people who let me out of the office. 

Thanks for reading,
Your favorite Blogger,

Monday, July 12, 2010

Kars for Kids

Oh yes, I am doing this to you.  This week's song to get stuck in your co-worker's heads is the worst, most obnoxious commercial jingle ever.  I believe this is an ad that is local to Boston, but even as such it is ever present.  You cannot escape it's wrath.  Enjoy, or watch your sanity break into a million pieces.

There is also a Techno Re-mix.  I share it because of the word swap in the intro, "Donate your kids today."

As a note, I'd like to point out that this is a perfect example of the power of Jingles. If you are a company looking to make an ad, have a jingle.  It is far cheaper and more effective than ruining a pop song that people like.

Thank you for reading,
Yer Ol' Pal,

Monday, July 5, 2010

Ruby Soho

I am going to be nice again, and by that I mean I'm shoving one of my favorite bands down your throat.  And no we aren't at the Pixies yet.  This weeks song to get stuck in your co-workers head is Rancid's Ruby Soho.

True story: I went some co-workers to see Rancid in 2002.  I was working at the mall so the co-workers in question were 2 wise ass college freshman that thought Rancid was a one hit wonder.  The one hit being Ruby Soho.

Rancid was/is/ALWAYS WILL BE one of my favorite bands and had been since '94.  Outside the show was this guy in his 50's wearing a Rancid hoodie.  He was obviously just some old guy who did odd jobs for the club, who was given  hoodie because he said he was cold.  The 2 co-workers looked at him and said, "Hey look, there's Pip in 30 years!"  They were mocking me, but it felt like a compliment.

Rancid did not play Ruby Soho that night, so the joke was on them.

Thanks for reading,
Your everlovin' blue eyed

PS- Destination unknown, Ruby Ruby Ruby-Ruby Soho!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Charlie Card + Phone = Jealous!

A couple things before we get into details:
1) Acetone is dangerous.  The acetone she used was not nail polish kids, so don't try this at home.  Have an ADULT who knows what they are doing take that first destructive step.  This is only partially a DIY project.
2) Yes losing your phone is now double-suck.  But if you lose your phone, are you really going to be that concerned with the $25 on your Charlie Card?  And think of it this way, when the a-hole phone thieves off the _____ stop of the subway take your phone, they'll have no idea it's got that extra value.  You'll be screwing them when they sell it!


This is really cool, but something I'll never do.  Because I'm lazy, hardly every ride the T anymore, and because I have a clear case on my phone so it would look dumb.  At least with the skin, it just looks like you put the skin on poorly.


Thanks for Reading!
Your favorite Blogger,

Monday, June 28, 2010

Saw Red

This week I have decided to be kind, or at least as kind as person can be with a project designed to get songs stuck into people's heads.  I will pick a song I love.  LOVE  I'll be even nicer by giving you music first and then story time.

So way back in 1998.  My amazingly awesome/creative friend Jess made a mix-tape for me.  An actual tape.  It was epic in its greatness.  There was not a song on there that I did not like.  Not one.  Or least now, 12 years later, I will swear I liked every song on there.  It was a tape and skipping songs was a pain in the ass so I listened to them all.

On this tape, loaded with good music, was a song by Sublime that I had never heard before.  One that had Gwen Stefani helping out on vocals. The song above, Saw Red.  I fell in love with this song instantly.  And it's short, fast, and kicks ass.  The few lyrics, or chorus, get stuck in my head.  And it's a scenario many understand, "Everyday I love her just a little bit more, but she loves me the same."

The song makes it here, because of a completely different, but equally as awesome/creative woman.  All I needed to sing that song to myself all day was just seeing her mention it.

Be warned, I will not always be nice.  And a box of worms has been opened that will lead to you being bombarded by The Pixies at some point.

Thanks for reading,
Yer Ol' Pal,

PS- If the cousin that called me weird on facebook actually clicks the link and reads this, then she will see that, indeed, had no idea how far off I am.  *Waves*  I did not name names, I'm being nice.

story time

Monday, June 21, 2010


This week's song to get stuck in your co-worker's head is Ke$ha's Tik-Tok.  But I am making it merciful on you because I am sharing with you the awesome Star Trek Video someone made for the song.  I promise laughter.  PROMISE.

See I am not all mean.

Spread the pain,
Your favorite Blogger,

Friday, June 18, 2010

Awesome Mario, Scary Mario

I came across both of these today.  I think I may need to rename my blog the Juxtaposed Outliers or something witty using a big word indicating I'm lazy and will only show two variants of the same damn thing.  But yeah, videos, you want videos.


I love how the sound of the coins came out, and the Invincible Star sounded great as well.  I wonder if he does birthdays.....?  Coda


Honestly, this looks like the bad dub stereotype.  If you are mad at me, then go blame Nerdcore.  He also posted the 20 minute video of the sound effects guy from Police Academy going through the history of typewriters.  I dare not do that to you.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Happy Duck, Sad Duck.

And what ties them together?  Humans giving them bread.

Happy Duck dances with pleasure.

This guy needs to be made into an animated gif.

Sad Duck does not like those damned Stripers stealing his lunch.

This poor guy gives up after while.

It was the best of quack, it was the worst of quack......

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Caribbean Queen

So thanks to this tweet, we have this week's Song to Get Stuck in Your Co-Worker's heads.

Caribbean Queen - Billy Ocean

And my friends, may you be the tiger she wants to tame.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Music Monday: Macarena

This week's song to get stuck in your co-workers' heads is the Macarena.  There is good reson for this!   But first the video.

Whenever the World Cup comes around, fore me, this song comes with it.  Now I am a rare, SMART, American that likes Soccer and I get as into the World Cup as my Brazillian neighbors do.  (I live in little Brazil and I could not really ask for better immigrant neighbors.)  In 1994 the World Cup came to America and I went to a couple of the games at the New England Patriots home stadium in Foxborough Mass.  It was there that I was introduced to the song and the dance, a full 6-12 months before the song blew up in America.  I watched this guy

do the dance.  I can't find a picture, but it was a costumed mascot version of Striker doing the dance. 

So with the World Cup starting up on friday, you should get in the mood by sharing the Macarena with those co-workers you love, or hate.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Music Monday - Evolve

This week's song to get stuck in your co-worker's head is that annoying song from the new Gatorade ad:

"But Pip," you say, "Is there a full version of the song I can use?"

Why yes, yes there is.

And until I heard the full version I though the lyrics were:

If you want a Revolution
The only solution
Is leave home

But really they are saying


Go forth and annoy,
Yer Ole Pal,

PS- Don't worry if you have today off, you can do this on tuesday.

PPS- For extra effect sing the bass part while bopping your head left and right.

*Bum* *Bum* *Bum* *Bum*

Monday, May 24, 2010

Music Monday: New Mission

We are changing the way we do Music Monday.  From now on, there may or may not be songs I like here.  There will however be an opportunity to make your day better, by making someone else's days worse.  The new mission for Music Monday is to see in how many people's heads you can get the song of the week stuck.

We start with the one I accidentally got stuck in my co-workers head last week:

Story:  So my co-worker was looking for something, and the conversation followed...

Coworker asked: Have you seen repair kit #4?
I replied: Is that like Mambo #5?

Game over, Pip wins.  Except it was not intentional.  the song I was trying to get stuck in my co-worker's head did not get stuck there.  I will accept my consolation prize as a victory.

Your favorite blogger,
and the only one working to make your Monday's better!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Bronte Sisters Power Dolls

Have you seen the Literary T-Shirts that have been all over the web the last few weeks?  If not where have you been?  They popped up in my Google Reader 3 times in the last week alone.  Anyway, for the lame, here's a quick catch-up.

Now, those are great and the people behind them are awesome.  But the Internet is not just about t-shirts, it's a giant game of Oneupmanship.   So how can those shirts be topped?

Bronte Sisters Power Dolls.  The other truths about the internet on display are:

1) Any joke product will make people want it to be real.  No matter how dumb or silly.
2) There is no limit on how far a geek will take something.

What I really want to know is, can we get a Mark Twain action figure to act as a sarcastic Bosworth to their 19th century Charlie's Angels?  Or am I the only one who can see that working as a cartoon?

Monday, May 10, 2010

Music Monday - Ear Bleeding Country, Covered

For those that did not understand the vague title, this week we have nothing but covers of Dinosaur Jr songs.  They are my favorite band.  And from my search for this post I found a ton of people doing the playing along thing, which needs to be banned from youtube because it's obnoxious and no one cares.  Not too many real band covers and nothing amazingly unique.

We'll start with this cool chick's acoustic version of Drawerings.

Pillow Man - The Lung

I have no idea who this guy is, but he does a really good version of Forget the Swan.

DJ Harrie - Forget the Swan

Kracked starts at 2:40

amoebaZ - The Lung/Kracked

Blink 182 covered Freak Scene on their demo, not bad either.

Blink 192 - Freak Scene

Life is made easy when you find a cover of Artist You Love A of a song by Band You Love B

Juliana Hatfield covering Dinosaur Jr  means there is still hope for the world.

Juliana Hatfield - Raisins

Saturday, May 1, 2010

The Good, The Bad, and The WTF!

Good: Hank Azaria will be playing Gargamel

Bad: in the upcoming live action/computer animated Smurfs movie.

WTF: It's a planned trilogy.

The Mayans were right, we're dead come 2012.

From Wikipedia:

Sony Pictures has announced plans to begin a trilogy of live-action/computer-generated Smurf films, the first to be released in 2011. The project had been in various stages of development since 2003.[20] In June 2008, it was announced that Columbia Pictures and Sony Pictures Animation have acquired film rights from Lafig Belgium. Current plans have Jordan Kernerproducing with Shrek 2 and Shrek the Third screenwriters J. David Stem and David N. Weiss in negotiations to write.[21][22]. The film is due to star Jonathan Winters as Papa Smurf, Katy Perry as Smurfette, George Lopez as Grouchy Smurf, Kevin James as Hefty Smurf and Alan Cumming as Gutsy Smurf. It was suggested that Quentin Tarantino would play Brainy Smurf, but this "didn't work out".[23]



Really, I have no reaction.  I cannot even bring myself to speak in Smurf.

My Apologies,
Your Ole Pal,